You are really in love and all the sparks are flying as you look forward to the "Big Day" i.e. the wedding day. All the planning meetings, the guest lists, the limo you want to ride in, the honeymoon arrangements, venues issues and relationship issues. Your mother still thinks you are too young for the transformation and your father is lamenting about how they used to do it in their time. Ah well, the stuff weddings are made off.
Okay, what's happening here? You have two things going: the event of the wedding day and the institution of marriage lining up for the take off. I look at the wedding as a symbolic ceremony of the beginning of the institution of marriage. From what I have seen and experienced, the husband and wife to be are usually taken up with the bric-a-bracs of the wedding day and mostly lose sight of preparation for the long term institution of marriage. This where all the shocks of adjustment come in after the wedding. You know, she notices that he just won't check if the house is securely locked at night (a thing her darling dad did every night). He wonders why she thinks it's such a biggie…
So before you say I do, much as you need to tie up the loose ends regarding the wedding day, keep your focus on what is required for the marriage. That way, your adjustment period will not be as bumpy.
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